The Long-Distance Mortgage: Can You Buy a Dutch Home Together While Living Apart?
NetherlandsJanuary 23, 2026

The Long-Distance Mortgage: Can You Buy a Dutch Home Together While Living Apart?

A couple, together for a decade but currently living 2.5 hours apart due to work commitments, faces a unique opportunity. One partner’s landlord offers to sell their rental home below market value, a deal impossible to finance alone but realistic with combined incomes. The catch? They must secure a joint mortgage while only one partner will initially occupy the property. This scenario, increasingly common in the Netherlands’ tight housing market, exposes a maze of legal registration requirements, mortgage eligibility rules, and financial risks that most conventional advice completely overlooks.

The Registration Trap: Why Your BSN Address Matters More Than You Think

Dutch mortgage contracts contain a standard clause known as the zelfbewoningsplicht (self-occupancy requirement). This legally obligates the mortgage holder to register their primary residence, their BSN (Citizen Service Number) address, at the mortgaged property. Banks enforce this because owner-occupied homes represent lower risk than investment properties. The logic seems straightforward: you get a mortgage, you move in.

But what if your job chains you to a different city for two more years? The partner who won’t live in the new house faces a dilemma. Registering elsewhere violates the mortgage terms, while registering at a property they don’t inhabit risks issues with both the Belastingdienst (Tax Authority) and the gemeente (municipality), which monitors primary residence registration. Many international residents discover this conflict only after signing mortgage papers, when the bank demands proof of occupancy.

Banks rarely verify registration during the application process, focusing instead on income verification and debt assessment. However, they can request a Kadaster (Land Registry) extract or cross-reference your BSN address during CDD (Customer Due Diligence) checks. If they discover false registration, they can demand immediate loan repayment or impose penalties. The risk isn’t theoretical, mortgage fraud investigations have increased as Dutch regulators crack down on housing market irregularities.

The Mortgage Math Myth: Why Dual Housing Costs Don’t Matter (Until They Do)

Here’s where conventional wisdom diverges from reality. Many couples assume that paying rent in one city while carrying a mortgage in another cripples their borrowing capacity. Dutch banks, however, operate differently. A rental contract does not count as a schuld (debt) in mortgage calculations. Banks examine only your income and actual financial obligations, existing loans, credit card debt, and other registered liabilities.

Your consumption patterns, whether you spend €500 monthly on dining out or maintain a modest €20 subscription, remain irrelevant. The bank’s reasoning: you can always adjust discretionary spending to cover the mortgage, but you cannot escape fixed debts. This explains why many comments from mortgage advisors confirm they never ask about current rent payments when calculating maximum loan amounts.

However, this creates a dangerous blind spot. While the bank ignores your rent, your actual cash flow does not. The couple in our scenario must realistically budget for both the hypotheeklasten (mortgage payments) and the partner’s existing rent for two years. A financial buffer becomes critical, especially when considering upcoming changes to Dutch wealth taxation that could impact joint asset ownership and savings strategies for co-purchasers. The new Box 3 system, shifting from fictional to actual returns taxation, might affect how you structure savings to cover dual housing costs.

Buying together without both partners living in the property requires meticulous legal planning. Dutch law allows multiple owners to purchase property, but you must explicitly document each person’s share, responsibilities, and exit strategy in a notariële akte (notarial deed). For couples, a samenlevingscontract (cohabitation agreement) becomes even more crucial when living arrangements complicate the standard assumptions about shared finances.

Consider the practical questions: Who pays for major repairs when only one person benefits from daily use? How do you split the box 3 tax liability on the property’s value? The tax applies to your share of the asset, regardless of where you sleep. If the relationship dissolves before the partner moves in, how do you handle a forced sale? Without clear agreements, Dutch courts follow standard co-ownership rules that may not reflect your original intentions.

The emotional pressure compounds these legal complexities. Partners often feel they’re falling behind peers who follow traditional paths. This psychological weight mirrors the emotional and social pressures around homeownership when navigating non-traditional paths like long-distance co-purchasing. The fear of missing out on a good deal can push couples to skip proper legal safeguards, creating vulnerabilities that surface years later.

The Landlord’s “Generous Offer” and Your Hidden Leverage

The landlord’s proposal, selling below market value to avoid the hassle of listing, sounds attractive but requires scrutiny. Dutch rental law provides tenants with powerful protections. Koop breekt geen huur (purchase doesn’t break rent) means a property sale cannot terminate your existing lease. Your landlord cannot evict you simply because they found a buyer.

This legal reality significantly impacts the property’s market value. A rented house typically sells for 20-30% less than a vacant one because buyers inherit a sitting tenant they cannot easily remove. Your landlord’s “discount” might merely reflect this legal discount, not genuine generosity. Before accepting, research comparable sales of both vacant and tenanted properties in your area. You might discover you hold more negotiating power than you realize.

Additionally, if you decline the offer, the landlord faces the lengthy process of selling with you still in residence, likely at that reduced price anyway. Understanding this dynamic helps you evaluate whether the deal truly benefits you or just offers the landlord a convenient exit.

The Tax Time Bomb: Box 3 and Co-Owned Property

Owning property in the Netherlands triggers vermogensbelasting (wealth tax) through the infamous Box 3 system. Even without a mortgage, the property’s value counts toward your taxable assets. For co-owners, this means each partner pays tax on their share of the property’s WOZ-waarde (official property valuation).

The system is transitioning from taxing fictional returns to taxing actual returns starting in 2028, a change that could significantly impact your long-term costs. If you plan to rent out part of the property to cover expenses, rental income falls under Box 1 (income tax), while the property value remains in Box 3, potentially pushing you into higher tax brackets. This complexity demands careful planning, especially when Dutch tax implications on wealth and investments may affect co-buyers’ financial planning and risk assessment.

Financial Reality Check: Income Stability and the “What If” Scenarios

The couple acknowledges that in two years, neither partner may have a vast inkomen (fixed income). Committing to a 30-year mortgage without stable earnings represents a massive risk. While the partner’s current rent is low, and combined housing costs seem manageable, future income uncertainty should dominate the decision.

Consider the worst-case scenarios: What if the partner’s job contract isn’t renewed? What if the relationship ends during the two-year separation? What if property values decline and you’re underwater on the mortgage? Unlike renting, you cannot simply give notice and walk away. The financial and legal entanglement persists until you sell, which could take months in a slow market.

The bank’s narrow focus on current income and debts ignores these broader risks. They assess whether you can afford payments today, not whether you should commit to decades of liability with uncertain future earnings. This is where personal financial discipline must override bank approval.

Actionable Steps: Navigating the Long-Distance Mortgage

If you’re considering this path, take these concrete steps before signing anything:

1. Consult a specialized hypotheekadviseur (mortgage advisor) who understands non-standard situations. Not all advisors grasp the nuances of registration requirements for couples living apart. Ask specifically about the bank’s policy on zelfbewoningsplicht and whether they allow temporary non-occupancy for work reasons.

2. Verify registration requirements with your municipality. Some gemeenten offer flexibility for temporary work-related housing situations. Get written confirmation of what constitutes primary residence registration and the consequences of registering at a property you don’t occupy full-time.

3. Draft a comprehensive co-ownership agreement. Even if you’re in a long-term relationship, document:
– Exact ownership percentages (e.g., 50/50 or proportional to financial contribution)
– Responsibility for ongoing costs (maintenance, insurance, property taxes)
– Exit strategy if one partner wants to sell or cannot fulfill the move-in plan
– How to handle profit or loss upon sale

4. Calculate true affordability including Box 3 tax. Use official WOZ values to estimate annual wealth tax on your share. Factor in potential changes from the 2028 Box 3 reforms, which could increase tax liability if your property appreciates significantly.

5. Stress-test your finances for dual housing costs. While the bank ignores the rent, you cannot. Create a realistic budget covering both the mortgage and the partner’s rent for the full two-year period, plus a 10% buffer for unexpected expenses.

6. Understand your tenant rights. Before accepting the landlord’s offer, have a real estate lawyer review the purchase agreement. Ensure the price truly reflects a discount beyond the standard reduction for buying a tenanted property.

7. Consider alternative structures. If the registration issue proves insurmountable, explore whether one partner can purchase alone with a smaller mortgage, perhaps with a family loan for the remainder. Or investigate gezinshypotheek (family mortgage) options that might offer more flexibility.

The Bottom Line: Possible, But Rarely Prudent

Dutch law and banking practice make it technically possible to secure a joint mortgage while living apart. The registration requirement can be circumvented, at least temporarily, and banks won’t penalize you for dual housing costs. However, the combination of legal risks, tax implications, and financial vulnerability creates a narrow path where the downsides often outweigh the benefits.

The emotional appeal of seizing a below-market deal and securing property before income disappears drives many couples to overlook critical safeguards. Yet the very constraints prompting this creative solution, uncertain future income and forced geographic separation, also make it exceptionally risky. If your financial stability depends on both partners eventually living in the property and maintaining steady income, any deviation from that plan could trigger a cascade of problems.

Before proceeding, ask yourself: Is this house worth the potential legal entanglement, tax complications, and financial stress? Or does the apparent opportunity mask a deal that primarily benefits a landlord seeking a convenient exit? In the Netherlands’ complex housing market, sometimes the smartest financial move is recognizing when a “good deal” creates more problems than it solves.

For couples navigating this challenging scenario, professional advice isn’t optional, it’s essential. The intersection of mortgage law, tax policy, and personal financial planning demands expertise that goes far beyond standard home-buying guidance. Invest in proper legal and financial counsel now, or risk paying far more later when the workaround becomes a trap.

Co-purchasing a home while living apart: a legal and financial workaround
Co-purchasing a home while living apart: a legal and financial workaround